Not Your Average Jane

Pain, suffering, agony....

There's a few good reasons I don't drink vodka....

Even the smell can make me queasy...

But hand me 3 Jello shots with vodka in em... Yeah theres a good reason I feel like ass warmed over this morning.... I don't get hungover EVER. Unless I have vodka. Sometimes tequila. But at the moment I'm running 4 Advil and half a gallon of water and yet to get out of my PJs... Though some sadistic ass told me I should work out and sweat it all out of my system... I may actually try that if I can't kick this soon... I woke up craving the worlds greasiest breakfast tacos and I have a feeling if I'd eaten before I went to bed I wouldn't be feeling anything....

Let me start at the beginning.

7 pm last night me at the Tavern. Just J and I for a while talking about some stuff... He's now one of the lucky few that knows the whole story of the ex... Which brings the grand total to like 6 now I think.... Anyway so we're talking about his ex and my current.... interest. Since I don't know what else to call him... We haven't hooked up, though not for my lack of trying so he's either a love interest or a crush and love interest just sounds better...

Anyway so other folks start showing up slowly and by 9 most everyone's there... Including a dude that looks a lot like Jesus Christ... Though as I was telling another chick there that he looked like him but I have a friend we call Jesus because he's a deadringer for the late great J.C. No lie... He's got the long hair, the beard and he's tall and skinny... And sandals are his footwear of choice regardless of the weather....

Back to the Tavern....

So at one point we made an Aggie do math.... He had to use his fingers and almost had to take off his boots to solve a problem.... It was quite humorous... We all kept talking about how f'ed up the whole time change was since at like 9 pm it felt like it should be like 11... There was mention of the vaginafish (long story there - involving a fish at the aquarium at the zoo) and how we hadn't seen it around lately... And there was a random dude having his pic taken with as many random girls as possible so I let him molest me... Cause whats a Tavern Tuesday without someone molesting me?

Let's see what else.... Oh yes... The jello shots... One dude I know bought the entire tray from the Jello shot girl and passed em out to people he knew... I had a funky blue one... Numero uno mistake.... I did it before I realized what kind of alcohol was in it... Then people start splitting off into their lil cliques and I head out with the smokers (cuz even though I don't smoke anymore I was getting a lil claustraphobic). So we're visiting and a few more people find out about my firing last week and current love interest... (I was given a hug and 'welcomed to the brotherhood'.... Okaaaaay....) And of course there are more Jello shots.... This time berry/grape ones that were even worse than the blue ones... I barely had time to enjoy the slight buzz I had before it hit the fan and me being me... Sobered up pretty quick when a drunk friend fell apart... Thats what happens when a girl starts crying and all the guys look at you because you're the only other chick in the vicinity. And yes I'm bossy and good in a crisis so she got calmed down but since she was gone her sister and another friend took over....

Somehow even though I went wanting to get backrubs last night... I ended up giving them out. Whats up with that? I know I'm good at it and all but come on yall I needed one a lot worse....

So I eventually get home sometime after 1 and walk the dog and pass out.... Now here I am almost lunch time trying to get motivated to do something... Anything...

We'll see how that works out...

Laters.

posted by Ali @ 10:47 AM