Monday, July 04, 2005

There are times I just don't know who or what to believe.... One person says one thing and another person yet another thing.... and both those things clash.... Do I make up my own truth? Who do I believe? What do I believe? One friend says one thing and when confronted about it another friend comes up with a whole new story... What do I do? Its not just these 2, either.... Amazing I know... But it seems as though everyone I know has some story or another that contradicts something someone else says or does and it's just vexing the hell out of me... Its a good thing I had a lot of time to think this weekend.... I still haven't figured out what to do, if anything about any of it but I did come to the realization that not everyone is as they seem... I feel like I should welcome myself to the real world or something...
On to other stuff.... Happier stuff... This weekend I went to New Braunfels... Actaully, 11 miles from NB, 11 from Seguin, and 11 San Marvelous... The Texas River Jam was Saturday... I got there about 3 or so and it was hotter than Hades... Saw Jay and Matt and their various significant others... Met some cute boys (don't I always? :) ), drank a shitload of DP, and had a lot of fun... I flirted of course (there were hot boys there, you think I wouldnt?!?!?!), but I couldn't get him outta my head.... I don't know why but I kept thinking what it might be like if he was there.... I was so tempted to call hot boy and make sure I had his phone # right so I could call him.... Turns out I didn't have to, if the number I have is right, then elise called him for me... Sorta.... She was answering a text from Gage and somehow she had my phone book opened and on his name.... She pushed send and dropped it... Then she grabbed it and pushed end... So I don't know if it went through or not... Its weird I barely know him and he feels like a freaking addiction or something.... He's not the hottest guy I know, so what is it about him? The military thing? I know lots of them and I'm not crazy about them like I am him... The muscles or musician thing? No. I know alot guys that have muscles or are musicians, a few have both.... So what is it about this one particular guy that I can't live without? Maybe its the fact he's polite and had manners and a lot of people these days don't... Its not cuz he's friends with Brown Bagger, if anything that would be a strike against him... Yet another after the name/past and present occupations thing....
ANYWAY... I was at River jam... got to see Burke and Ryan Turner again... I was very demanding... I made Ryan play all my favorite songs that he does... And he was really sweet and did the ones I asked for.... I dig that... I swear that boy says good bye more than I do... But he's so adorable we'll forgive him... Met a few other guys I would have hit it with but alas... I couldn't... Not just for the whole preoccupation with him thing either.... That was a bit of it... 2 left too early, another hooked up with another girl, another one never showed, and one is still way too young for me... Though I did have a really good dream about him this morning.... ;)
So I came back yesterday about 2... Ate lunch and showered and then slept till 6.... I woke up and ate dinner and went to Blockbuster.... Watched some movies and read a book.... Gage drunk dialed me, told me why he couldn't make it the night before and I understood but didn't like it.... Went to bed about 4 this morning and woke up at noon.... I also found out when I got home from La that mom's not due back in town till the 9th.... WTF?!?! That was one of the reasons I came back early... The whole ex and his current girl being at the Icehouse, driving, and dealing with holiday traffic were the others.... But Mom was the main one.... Ah well.... I'll live....
I have no idea what I'm doing today or tonight, but I guess I'll figure it out while I'm doing it.... I'm going to call the boys and see what they're up to... First to shower and water the yard... Laters....

posted by Ali @ 1:45 PM

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